Another week another kilo (not a good one)

A gain this week - bah humbug. All my fault. Have been following the "see food" diet and the scales show it. Zanna is putting me to shame - 6 weeks of no alcohol and good eating, she is soooo motivating and I am sooooo envious of her resolve.

On the positive side - am slowly getting back into exercise
Sunday - swimming
Monday - gym
Tuesday - walk Lucy
Wednesday - walk Lucy and small yoga stretch session
Thursday - walk Lucy
Friday - gym
Saturday - walk Lucy and pilates

These arent long walks or full gym sessions but am working my way back towards being fully mobile again.

(Lucy has to lose weight too. My two months of inactivity have meant that she has also been fairly inactive and needs to lose around a kilo. I got roused on at the vets when I took her for her yearly shots and check up.)

Got my new sneakers yesterday. After talking to my podiatrist last week, got runners rather than cross trainers. My new orthotics should be ready this week and he will fit them into the new shoes. Went for custom made orthotics this time which was an interesting experience especially the mold imprinting. He suggested that I get runners because they are lighter and the orthotics willgive me all the support I need. Picked Rykas because I liked the fact that they only make shoes for women but virtually had to arm wrestle the nice child in footlocker to get them. He was polite and pleasant and I am old and fiesty but I dont appreciate being lectured to about what shoes I should buy. I didnt get exactly what I wanted as apparently they were last years style - this years style was pink. Oh well - they look all new and sparkly.

DS is back from Thailand safe and sound. Have had yet another heart to heart with DD and hopefully things will get better here at home.

Off to Officeworks this morning with DH. Love stationery stores.

Have a great week everyone and will really try this week - I promise.

It's hard sometimes

To succeed at what we have decided to do we have to become selfish.

Putting ourselves and our needs first.

This can be a very hard thing for women (sorry if there are any guys who read this). There are so many things and people pulling us every whichway that sometimes it is just easy to say, "damn it, it's all too hard, pass the chocolate".

Well, someone once said "life wasnt meant to be easy"! Its not easy, its not fair but we do have choices. And most of us are making good ones most (but not all) of the time. We are not perfect, we stumble, get up, trip, get up, run, skip, stumble again - this goes on and on - this is life.

I read your blogs - your wonderful inspirational blogs - that have kept me going when times and circumstances seem so overwhelming.

I know you all struggle at some time, we all do, but we keep coming back to this place and saying help, give me your knowledge, support and do you know what, it always arrives.

This week:

• I am having my first day back at the gym tomorrow after an absence of over 2 months and I have worked out a program so that I can start slowly and hopefully build up to the levels I was at pre every thing going pear shaped last year.
• I went swimming today and improved on what I did last week and felt more comfortable doing it.
• I am going to take Lucy walking this week two or more times building up the distance each time.
• I am getting rid of my picture on my blog (when I can remember how to) because I look like a toothless old hag - my god whatever possessed me to put one up.

I hope you all have a wonderful week.

Good and Bad

So much for trying to be good over the weekend. I know I'm not alone in this - when confronted with food I eat, when stressed I eat, when drinking alcohol I eat, when unhappy I eat, when bored I eat.....you all get the picture. I think I may have had one or at the most two days since I last posted when I can say I stayed within the points. Bugger!!! My fault completely. Oh well Im have to start again.

Good news - aircast is off foot. Ankle is still sore and I think my calf muscle has wasted (apparently only takes two weeks) but doctor says break has healed well and I can start walking, swimming, cycling again. But start slowly and build up to it. I think I have forgotten how to walk and stairs are giving me a bit of a problem but I will try. Might even go swimming this Sunday.

Only my little finger is still in a splint. Apparently healing quite well. Back to surgeon in 4 weeks for another xray and evaluation. Seem to have forgotten how to type and my writing looks like a 5 year old but these too can be relearnt. I am mobile again and can drive myself.

DD graduated on Tuesday. I dont think I could have been any prouder and when the 799 marched onto the parade ground I got all teary. I know I wasnt the only one. Her graduation photos are beautiful. She has started work already and tonight is her first night shift.

DS sounds like he is having a ball in Thailand. I think a lot of alcohol is involved. Will be glad when he is home again. Im such a mother!

First week back at work and everything seems to be going well. Better than I expected. Everyone will be away next week at conference so I am looking forward to the peace and quiet to get some of those things I keep putting off done.

Hope you all had a better week than me food wise and your weekends are relaxing.

Naughty

I am weighing myself everyday which I know is not ideal and I shouldnt do it because I know it can be very disheartening, and I will STOP this Saturday but because I am not exercising I have been interested in seeing that if I can keep within my daily calorie intake whether I can lose the weight I have put on over the last 5 weeks.

I have been tracking religously except when I eat out (too hard to guestimate but I do try to be sensible). I am trying to keep within allowance although most days I find I just go over.
I have been drinking at least 6 glasses of water a day.
I have a little book to write everything down.
I have been wearing my pedometer again even though I cant get over 5000 steps per day.
I am surprised at the amount of carbs in fruit (are there such things as good carbs?).
I mostly have confined myself to one glass of wine a day, when DH gets home from work, but am aiming for every other day.

It is raining today and the bushfires are receding. We were okay here at home because the wind was always on our side but I was worried about work. Although over 900 hectares of my beloved park has been burned no properties or people were destroyed.

DS had his own fire to fight on Monday at work. They think kids started it as two were seen running from the area just prior to it going up. He arrived home for his weekly baked dinner covered in black soot and smelling like he had been smoked and extremely abuzz. Elvis was there too and apparently amazing to watch in action close up. The course staff concentrated on put out the spot fires that had jumped two fairways and were heading towards houses and left the main fire to the regular firies and of course the magnificant Elvis and friends. I gave him some of his fathers clothes, he went for a swim and I washed his clothes. So proud of him, he is growing into a magnificent man.

DD has her roster now and starts next week. She is understandably nervous and is not a person I would recommend talking to at the moment as she is a bit depressed or as I've come to classify these people "sunshine suckers". I know this probably seems harsh but she does not like new things or change, never has, from her first job at a fast food call centre at 15 when I had to drive her to work for her first shift after training and force her out of the car (she worked there 5 years). I dont think I can do that this time, after all she is an adult and armed and certainly does have attitude.

DS off to Thailand on Friday (I know he will be fine but he enjoys stirring me up by talking about skydiving etc).

Rugby season is nearly upon us again and I have just signed up for a tipping competition for the Super14s. I really have no idea, and DH will tell me so, but it will be really interesting to see how I do as opposed to those who "know" what they are talking about. Teehee. I have great aspirations.

A big weekend ahead - at least two long lunches (there goes the tracking again) but I will try. Early start tomorrow as we have to pick up DDs furniture and bring it back to Sydney and of course we have to fit in with DDs plans ie a hairdressing appointment in Sydney at 1:30 pm. Some things never change. I am just there for company as I am still classified as disabled, and once I am fully wake up will plug in my iPod and sing to DH to keep him alert. Nobody could not be alert at the sound that I make.

Hope all you Aussies have a great Australia Day. Make good choices and enjoy. Have a good week too.

A tag game....

I have accepted Zanna's tag and have probably done it the wrong way - there was probably an easier way to do this but I copied and pasted.

Things you may not have known.....

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Mail sorter
2. Secretary
3. School Assistant
4. School Admin Manager

B) Four movies I would watch over and over:
1. Sleepless in Seattle
2. Casablanca
3. Breakfast at Tiffany's
4. Under a Tuscan Sun

C) Four places I have lived
1. Putney
2. Gladesville
3. Gordon (very briefly)
4. Asquith

D) Four favourite T.V. shows
1. West Wing
2. Biggest Loser
3. Buffy the vampire slayer
4. Midsommer Murders

E) Four of my favourite foods:
1. Any starchy carbohydrate
2. Nibblies (cheese,dips, sundried tomatoes - you get the picture)
3. Thai
4. Freshly fried chips and spicy tomato sauce
(Now you can see why I am constantly battling my weight)

F) Four places I would rather be right now:
1. Actually quite happy here at home but .....
2. Work (I know but I am bored)
3. Having lunch with girlfriends
4. France

G) Four friends I think will respond: (sorry blog mates I know you have probably all done this before)
1. Caramelkitkat
2. Linda
3. Sue
4. Michelle

Two weeks.....

Two weeks to go -

Removal of the "pretend ski boot" for the broken ankle and the finger splints. Yahoo! I will be able to walk, drive a car, use my credit card, fill out forms, be independent again.

Back to work - DH is taking some time off, working from home and driving me for the first couple of days because I may not be quite there by the time I have to go back.

DD is graduating and going to be a real policeperson (a probationary one but nonetheless real).

DS is going to Thailand and I will be extremely tense until he returns safe and sound.

Now the bad news -
Have put on over 4 kilos since I have been immobile. Am bored, frustrated and prbably trying to do too much.

DD has been home on leave and has wiped out my internet usage for the month so everything is extremely slow and I cant see everyones photos as they take too long to come through if at all.

Good news:
Our holiday to Rutherglen was successful. Captured many bottles of wine which will be treated kindly and shared with friends. It was hot - 39 degrees most days but air conditioning makes it all bearable. They are in drought, as is most of Australia, at the moment. The grass broke when you walked on it! Hopefully the drought will break in 2007.

DS came up on his way home from work on Sunday and put a wetting agent on DHs lawn. I know lawns arent good things to have in droughts but DH is a lawn freak and usually has it looking like a bowling green.

Have actually used my time to catch up with filing and bill paying in my study. Will try to keep on top of it this year. Still have more to do but it is getting there.

French is progressing slowly. I see there are french classes starting in May at local TAFE so I will have to check that out. LOL - have been reading the french instructions on skincare products and trying to decipher.

Well DH is looking after everything - cooking, cleaning up and the big one - ironing! Friends think he is making an early run for "husband of the year". He apparently won the 2006 title due to having to organise another Christmas by himself. I say - since he is so good at it he might get the job permanently - hehe, no I wouldnt be that mean, he really is a treasure,

Off now to liberate a bottle of the captured wine while I wait for him home from work. He will be late so I may even try to make something for dinner otherwise we will be eating at midnight. Did I mention how frustrating it is to be incapacitated. Oh I did - sorry, will stop whinging immediately.

If at first you don't suceed.......

OK here I go again. Hopefully this will work this time as Im finding typing tedious and extremely hard.

I had my hand operation on 21st December. Pins inserted into the thumb, index and little finger on my right hand to fuse the first joint. The plaster came off yesterday and I now have individual splints held on with hot pink velco and exercises and pshysio for the next 4 weeks. My joints were so badly affected by the arthritis I had to have a bone graft (taken from my wrist). I cant work out which has been the most painful.

You would think that is enough wouldnt you but oh no
Last September I slipped over in the city and I thought I had just badly sprained my ankle. Guess the healing process meandered on because I wasnt doing much while I was awaiting my back operation in October but once I was over that I was off and running literally. Couldnt do weights but concentrated on cardio. Mid December lower leg blew up and I hobbled back to GP (who has now instigated a care plan for me) had it xrayed and guess what, old break (probably Sept fall) had shifted and of course all the ligaments I had damaged werent helping so off to foot surgeon the next day and now have one of those big boots because I couldnt have plaster or crutches as I was going into hospital the next day for my hand.

So here I am, yet again virtually housebound for another school holidays. Oh well the rest will do me good.

NEW YEARS RESOLUTION: No hospitals for me in 2007 (pray the ankle heals well and I wont need surgery).

DD is home at the moment from college and she has been driving me to drs appts. She goes back next Friday week and then it is only a couple of weeks to graduation.

DS is off to Bali in a couple of weeks. My opinion that he should not go was ignored as usual but he did ask me.

DH and I are driving down to Rutherglen next week using the time DD is in Sydney to mind Lucy so we can take the car for a spin.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year. I have caught up with most of the blogs.
Sharon I love your new hair cut. It looks amazing.
Zanna, the poem "Twas the month after Christmas" is winging its way to some of my friends who I know will relate to it.
Jodie, congratulations on the new teeth milestone.

Have read two books -
Whitethorn Woods by Maeve Binchy and The Dreamkeepers Daughter by Kim Edwards. Both completely different but both really enjoyable.
Enjoying listening to my Edith Piaf CD (Chrissie present from DD)
Have started my french lessons so hopefully by next year, if and when, we go to Europe I will be able to at least understand it and maybe speak it.
Am slowly working my way back to my sensible eating plan (notice the absence of the word diet). Exercise is a pipedream at the moment so I will have to rely on eating better and drinking less (perhaps another pipedream).

Take care and enjoy 2007 - I intend to.

Update and sign out

Heaven knows what happened to this post. Thanks Michelle for alerting me. Will try again tomorrow as I only have one hand working at the moment and it takes forever to type.

Living Life to the Full

Life has been a bit hectic lately.

Im a bit stiff in my joints and back but otherwise I feel good.

My middle sister turned 60 in October and because I was in hospital I missed her birthday lunch so I took her out to lunch on Saturday and then on to see "Woman In Mind" with Noni Hazelhurst. It was something she normally doesnt do and I think she enjoyed the day out.

On Sunday we had friends for lunch and it was an extremely long lunch with me finally getting into bed around 1 a.m.

Monday night I went to the last Sydney U2 concert and danced and sang the night away. Maybe not the best thing to do for a recovering back but boy did I have fun. Everyone keeps saying, including Mark, I dont know any songs that U2 sing so last night I tuned my ipod into the radio and played all their songs for him.... oh yes, he had heard them before. Have just ordered an ipod shuffle to complement the ipod 40gb one I have as I needed something smaller for walking. Sounds silly doesnt it but I find my normal ipod too bulky.

Finally bit the bullet last week and bought a ghd hair straightener over the internet. Good price, although not as good as, was it Mary?, but anyway I was pleased. Jess has had one for nearly a year and when she is home I use hers but she seems to be coming home less as the session goes on and her days at the college are getting longer. So, I bought my own.

Finally finished my "Walking Africa" challenge. Looking forward to the next one but as I have broken my pedometer, snapped the back off this one, dont know my own strength, I will have to wait until new one arrives.

IMPORTANT QUESTION: Now everytime I open my blog up it asks me to sign over to the new version. If I do this will it make problems for me, knowing I am not that computer literate. It says it wont but should I believe it.

Have instigated Shannon Lush's latest book "Speed Cleaning" into my life. Initially it was a bit daunting, because even with a cleaning lady, this house had not been cleaned properly for a long time but now it is easier and as long as I follow her tenets I think I will be able to keep on top of it. Of course having only two people here is a bonus.

My study (formerly known as Gareth's bedroom) is finished. Repainted, new carpet, all my desks, bookcases and some of my painting equipment moved in. Will have to get Optus to move broadband connection but am managing at the moment with a very long Cat5 cable run under the house. Just got to clean out his wardrobe of all the things he has left behind and then I can use that for additional storage. It is heaven.

Gareth is participating in "Mo-vember". Being so fair (but extremely cute) his mo is taking some time to grow but I sent off my donation today and am looking forward to it hopefully being shaved off on December 1.

Have gone to see a doctor re the dreaded menopause - a GP who is also a naturopath. I have to have a blood test done and then we will see where it goes from there. Didnt mind the "power surges" in winter but I think that they will be a bit hard to take in summer.

Back to the back surgeon next week for a final check. PT at gym says I cant go back to pilates for 3 months total (2 months to go) so I will have to rely on walking although my muscles feel like jelly and the first few walks felt like I was walking on marshmallows. I cant believe how quickly the muscles degenerate. I will know more after I talk to surgeon next week. I could kiss this man - I am so grateful not to be in pain anymore.

Anyway, enough rambling. Hope you all are having a good week and I will catch up with your blogs tomorrow and Friday.
Take care

I'm fine

Sore but not sorry. The nerve pain in the left leg has gone. Just operation sore now I think. Resting heaps, eating for more than 1 (even though there is definitely only one - damn here I go again). Will take my first walk on Saturday under supervision (DH insists). Looking forward to getting back to normal. Thankyou for the kind emails and ecards. Hope your week is going well.....
PS Have been trying to post this but either broadband is being difficult or blogger is. No Saturday walk because it is rainy and cold again. Progressing well though.

A Prayer

This prayer was sent to me by a dear friend. I am not a religous person but I loved the words and hence I pass it on to anyone who cares to read it.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us.

Im off tomorrow for the operation that I seem to have been talking about forever. I am not sure when I will be able to return to blogging because as usual I forgot to ask some important questions like when will I be up and about. I expect to probably be home on Saturday or at the latest Sunday.

Causes for Celebration

Today is the last day of work for this term. Yahoo. Once I finish up the BAS and final payments and end of term reports, back up computers it is time to kick back and just enjoy. Sleeping in is on the cards for the next month.

Sleeping in the next month because I have my back op on 12 October - under 2 weeks! So looking forward to it. Who would have thought! Two weeks holiday and then 2 weeks recuperating

Tomorrow is my 53rd birthday. I cant tell you how quickly the years are flashing past now. It seems to me that I am on fast forward all the time. DH is still in France. I was going to the races with friends but sanity has prevailed and they suggested that I might not be able to manage it without having my rock (DH) with me. I must admit I heaved a sigh of relief - I didnt want to be the one to pull the plug. So, I am going up to watch the Swannies win another grand final with friends (I will yell and shout and have no idea what in the hell is going on but will enjoy the atmosphere anyway) and then on to a special birthday dinner with more friends which is incredibly sweet of them.

DD is coming up from Goulburn and taking me out to lunch on Sunday. I suggested that she do this as I dont need any presents - maybe out to one of those nice plant nurseries out Dural way where I can buy some plants.

I will catch up with DS sometime on Saturday I think. He has been helping me with pool maintenance this week, especially after last Sunday - the backyard looked like a cyclone had gone through it. We had our roast on Monday night - my butcher made me the cutest little lamb roast - just enough for two. Yesterday he came up and put the garbage bins out for me as I just cant manage them at the moment.

Having lunch next week with M. I am going to the opera house for a matinee performance of The Tempest and we are catching up. I am so glad as I have missed so many meetings(?) over the last six months.

Middle sister is coming down for lunch next week and eldest sister is coming down to stay for a couple of nights at the end of October. They are still not talking to each other and while it did cross my mind to engineer a meeting ES has warned me not to or she wont come. It is so hard as I dont want to alienate her so I guess I will be a chicken and let sleeping dogs lie. (How is that for a group of cliches.)

MS is 60 this year, next month actually. Nothing has been arranged. Have tried to contact her partner but he is either never home or maybe on the computer. Dont want to leave a message as it would arouse her suspiscions. So have sent an email to her daughter asking if anyone was going to arrange something to celebrate her birthday. I am a bit annoyed. She does so much for her children and they should know that even if she says dont worry they should do something. I actually was thinking about having a surprise dinner for her until I remembered that I would still be recovering from op. What I have decided that belatedly, in November, I would take her to the theatre to see the new play "Woman In Mind" with Noni Hazelhurst. Have made the offer and am waiting to see what she says.

Anyway enough waffling. GO THE SWANS! Have a great weekend (a long one in NSW).

Missing DS

I got halfway through reading everyones blogs and have to give up.

It is all too much.

Im tired - pain making sleep impossible
My DH is now overseas - thank God or I would be keeping him awake every night too
Im in pain - seems to be getting worse and the demotivation is phenomenal (or however you spell it). Luckily only fairly heathly food in house at moment although I am eating far too much of that even.
Im lonely - God it has only been two days

Please stop the wind. I dont need the extra work of trying to keep the pool clean. (Im a whinger arent I?)

Spent this week at a conference and met some really inspiring women from all over the State. If I was in a better frame of mind it would have been awesome.

Off to bed.
Things to look forward to this week:
Last week of work before 2 weeks holiday and then 2 weeks sick leave
Being audited by the dept auditor (no not really looking forward to it)
Birthday on Saturday (either at the races or watching the Swannies with friends win another grand final)
Dinner with son tomorrow night - since he has moved out we are so close. Funny isnt it. I really look forward to him visiting. Now just have to get him to clean out his room (aka my study). Speak of the devil, guess who just rang to make sure I was okay and to sort out what we are doing for my birthday.
Second call, eldest sister(es) having a really bad time with Mum. Finally understands what middle sister and I was (were?) talking about.
Rambling now - bed time
Hope everyone has a great week
xxxzzzzz

Feedback on Calorie King

A quick question - is anyone following calorie king? I just had a quick look at it, and found out I already have the book (one of many). Thinking I might give it a go as I am seriously demotivated with Weight Watchers. It's not entirely their fault but I know I need help at the moment and I dont feel that I can get it by revisiting Weight Watchers again.

Have just cancelled my account for the online diary etc with Weight Watchers which I think was costing me about $16.95 a month. Calorie King offers a years subscription for $29 with an online diary. Seems good value for me as I did like the online diary at Weight Watchers although I found it cumbersome and awkward to use.

Anyway, if anyone is using this plan let me know. For once I am not rushing into something mainly because I know the problem lies within myself. I have to get my mind around this problem I am having with food.
:o)

Kind of sad

Hi everyone
Have been reading everyone's blogs and am kind of sad that people seem to be dropping off (including me). Life gets busier and busier doesnt it.

I dont email or read blogs at work anymore as I found it was interfering with my workload. Anway, they are starting to block personal emails and other things now with their new system. Hasnt quite caught up with our centre yet but it is coming.

Home life is busy too.

Am home today as I fell over on Saturday and twisted my ankle and cant quite flex it enough to drive. (High heels, all day at the rugby and alcohol definitely dont mix - you'd think I'd know that by now wouldnt you?)

All booked in for operations - back op is on 12 October and hand op is on 21 December. (My sister reckons I am just trying to get out of Christmas again and she is probably right.)

DH is due to go to France on business again soon. He is trying to get out of it - typical of a person who travels a lot and is a real homebody. He may be away for my birthday but I have told him that is okay but I expect a HUGE present. May end up going to races for my birthday with friends. We'll see.

DS is all settled in his unit with mate. They have now bought everything they need and we only see him once a week for the baked dinner. He sold his king single bed for me on ebay and he came up to be here when the bed was picked up. Got heaps more than I thought I would and I am one step closer to setting up my study in his old room.

DD is not in the newbie group at college anymore. The new recruits started today. She has exams coming up and so wont be home this weekend (first time since she went down). She is still loving every moment of it and doing extremely well. Funny isnt it - she struggled at school, being more interested in sport than schoolwork but she is doing extremely well down there.

The children came home yesterday (fathers day) and cooked lunch for DH. It was really funny, DS rumbled his sister constantly all day - she couldnt walk past him without being attacked. He said that it was something he missed as they arent usually at home at the same time and when they have seen each other it is usually in a pub or club and he didnt feel he should rough her up (read brotherly love) in public.

Anyway, enough about me and mine - CONGRATULATIONS TO JODIE AND JAIMIE. Zoe is absolutely beautiful. Well done M for keeping us uptodate. Hope Jaimie enjoyed his first fathers day - well timed!

Congratulations to everyone who received flowers lately. So did I - from my boss (actually a beautiful deep pink cyclamen) for SASS (school admin support staff) appreciation week. What a surprise. Thought he had had enough of me being sick.

Anyway, hope everyone is having a great week.
xxx

Attempt number (god only knows)

Here I go again. I am starting again again again.

I am going to weight watchers for weigh in tonight even though I know it will be ugly (even more ugly than last time).

I am going to have to deny myself all the extra special treats I have been having (as much as I can anyway). And it really will be deny.

I think my problem is that my brain (or is it my stomach) doesnt ever register as being full. I just keep eating.

I watch my children and husband all say they have had enough, and am continually amazed that they can say this. I dont think that I have ever not finished a meal completely and I eat extremely fast (actually a family joke about the speed of my eating). I try to slow down and leave some but cant do it (yet). Same with drinking alcohol, I guzzle. Thank goodness for rounds otherwise Id be under the table quicker than you could say, yes I'll have another one.

Anyway it is heading toward lunch time and I havent caved in and ambushed the bikkie barrel at work (either of them - sweet or savoury) so hopefully this augurs well for the rest of the week.

I have a 21st at the races this weekend to contend with and not wanting to sound defeatist dont hold out great hopes of me not eating or drinking too much. The saving grace is I have a toothache and it might slow me down a bit (that's sad isnt it?).

Aside: the lyrebird has come down to my office window and is loving his reflection and making noises like a bicycle bell (at least that is what I think it sounds like) and calling to his mate. Magic.

Goals:
Stay within points each day (back to 18 a day to get me back in line)
Exercise each day somehow (neurosurgeon tomorrow)
Cut down on carbs (my favourites)
Get new trainers organised (keep walking into shops, looking and leaving - it is all too hard)

Have a great weekend.....

The delight of Spring

From Wind in the Willows:
"Spring was moving in the air above and in the earth below and around him, penetrating even his dark and lowly little house with its spirit of divine discontent and longing."

I know how Moley felt - I can feel the stirring and the general feeling of well-being that these gorgeous days with their brillant warmth, incredible sunrises and sunsets bring. The warmth makes the aches and pains less and fills me with "joi de vie".

Had the MRI today at the San. It was fine. I was a little sleepy from sedation and my sister came down to drive me again but I treated her to a fine lunch at the local pub with a glass of wine which all in all was a pleasant way to spend Friday. Had xrays of hands done at the same time and it is off the hand surgeon on Tuesday week to talk about fusing some joints.

It is surprising the number of people who have told me that they too have had bulging discs and that it righted itself after months or even years. How on earth do you put up with this pain for so long? I cant walk, I cant stand, I have trouble sleeping because of the pain when I am lying down. I have stood it for 4 months but if I can possibly have an operation and get some relief I will chance it.

Anyway back to wind in the willows:
"up we go, up we go till at last, pop! his snout came out into the sunlight and he found himself rolling the warm grass of a great meadow. This is fine he said to himself. This is better than whitewashing!" The sunshine struck hot on his fur, soft breezes caressed his heated brow, and after the seclusion of the cellarage he had lived in so long the carol of happy birds fell on his dulled hearing almost like a shout. Jumping off all his four legs at once, in the joy of living and the delight of spring without its cleaning, he pursued his way across the meadow till he reached the hedge on the further side."

So sorry...I've been slack

I've been slack lately. Giving in to the blackness - well not really but it sounds dramatic.

Back to weight watchers last week. Knew the result was not going to be good but I was over by 1.8 kgs (not a lot but extremely hard to move). Paid my money and have tried to hop back on the wagon. Know what to do but am finding it hard this time round but have been tracking even if some of the daily results have been horrific.

Thanks for the emails of support especially M. I dont know what I would do without them.

Cirque dul soleil with DS was wonderful. Not only was he a wonderful person to go with and enjoyed it as much as me but he took all the stress I was feeling about going out of the day and made it even more enjoyable. Nothing was too much trouble. When he came for dinner last night for his weekly roast he actually mentioned that we get on so much better now we dont live together and he is right. I get lots of help when he is around as well as all encompassing hugs (I think I come up to his armpits).

We are in the middle of a storm at the moment and Lucy is sitting on my lap shivering so typing is a bit difficult.

Went back to rheumatologist today and he supplied me with a new form to get the MRI done before I go to next neurosurgeon. Sister is once again coming down to drive me because I may have to be sedated because I dont like enclosed spaces. Also getting my hands xrayed as I have an appointment with the hand surgeon. Need to have the thumb and index finger joints on my right hand fused (arthritis strikes again)apparently. So many doctors so much money - oh well. DH keeps muttering about trading me in on a new model (something about when cars start costing you a lot of money it is time to trade them in).

DS loves the police academy. She missed her boyfriend but comes home every weekend but loves Goulburn and what she is doing.

I hope everyone had a great time at the dinner on Saturday night and you all ran/walked well in the C2S. I was thinking of you all and looked for you on the TV. I know you were the ones in the red caps.

I have been trying to do sudokus at the moment. Am trying to keep my brain active and I do love numbers but I fear that these may be beyond me. I get so far and then realise that Ive made a mistake and give up. I will have to buy a book with easy ones in it until I work out how to do them. I thought I had it today but was wrong again.

Anyway I hope everyone is having a great week and I am going to catch up with your blogs this week if it kills me.
Take care........

Pain Management Blog

Well lots of things have happened.

As per previous post, decided I didnt really like the spinal surgeon I went to see a couple of weeks ago but thought I would have the MRI done so I was prepared for whatever next happens. Of course, I lost the form. Have rung and asked for another one but I am not holding my breath as the receptionist did sound too hopeful. Probably justifies my thoughts on the doctor.

I have broken out into a rash - dont know what it is caused by but my GP is overseas so I went to see the locum and got some cortesone cream which seems to be working. Skin is really dry and itchy and I have a feeling it is something to do with menopause. The locum was also an acupuncturist and talked me into having acupuncture on my back. DH was not enthusiastic and in the meantime, between appointments, I had a meeting with a personal trainer at the gym to work out a program that I could manage without having to put my membership on hold. She was great and had had two back ops herself (dont know why and didnt like to ask) so was able to help me with a very small exercise program but she also gave me the name of three doctors.

I rang the first one, first thing Monday morning, and the receptionist told me that he had closed his books but they were having a meeting that morning about reopening them and to ring back at lunchtime. Now I feel this is good karma because when I rang back she gave me an appointment for 25 August.

Anyway the upshot is I cancelled the acupuncture, made an appointment with my GP next week so I can get a referral to the specialist.

This is fast turning from a weight loss blog into a pain management blog but hopefully not for long.

I have been a bit up and down with my food lately and today has been particularly woeful. Anything that faintly resembled food has been eaten without a backward glance. I know I shouldnt and I am telling myself I shouldnt as I shovel it in but cant seem to stop myself.

Am bored at work - maybe because it looks such a lovely day outside and I wish I was out there. As nobody is here today but me I went and sat outside in the sun for a while - could have laid down and nodded off.

Friends are coming for dinner tomorrow night and then the rugby on Saturday night. DS turns 24 on Sunday. DD is home for the weekend (sort of).

Nearly time to go home - time to close everything down. Hope you all have a great weekend. Sunshine here I come.......

Life moves on

Found out what is wrong with my back: a herniated bulging disc. Three options:
Learn to live with the pain
Try injections again
Have an operation to cut away where the disc is bulging and pinching the nerve.

I guess the next step is an MRI. Have to ring and find out about having one with sedation because of the claustrophobia(?).

Anyway am surviving with minimum amount of sleep and eating everything in sight.

My sweet little canary, Spike, died last week. He has had a number of strokes over the past couple of years but always managed to survive and recovery but I guess this time he didnt. He looked very peaceful, I actually thought he was asleep.

We have removed our slow combustion fire from our loungeroom and replaced it with air conditioning. We have had the fire for over 20 years and it was lovely but its use by date was up and I must admit pushing a button is easier than trying to light a fire everynight. DH keeps muttering - "its not as warm as the fire".

Children have all settled into their respective new homes. DD came home last weekend (only to shower and trash) and we met the boyfriend for the first time. He was nice and it was so funny watching her be all soft and sweet. DS spent last week in Queensland at a conference. I dont think Brisbane will ever be the same.

DH very kindly gave up the option of watching the second match of the Bledisloe live this Saturday to go with friends to see Doug Parkinson and have dinner at the local Thai. We will tape it and watch it when we get home. Hopefully it will be a better result than last time (for the Wallabies that is - sorry to all the All Black fans).

Am getting back into the swing of things at work but as usual the days are not long enough. Roll on summer
:o)