2011 here I come

No resolutions this year. Last years list of things I wanted to do never got completed let alone acted on.
Keep it simple.
Three weeks since op. Taking it very easy. Up to walking around the block now. What used to take me 10 mins now takes 30 but baby steps - remember baby steps.
Corset/brace makes me look so slim but after a while hurts - maybe too tight but I do look slim if slightly lumpy.
Thinking of giving the gym away. I will miss it but I don't think there is a lot I can do there now. Will talk to neurosurgeon when I see himnin February.
Love my iPad so much. It comes with me everywhere and has niftly little red leather case. Am playing a form of scrabble with my sister and children and seriously kicking a**e. Take no prisoners is my motto.
My kindle has had some serious workouts. Easier for me to read lying down then a book - lighter.
Except for new years day the weather has been cool and rainy. Summer seems to have disappeared but I know it will be back with vengeance. Actually went in the pool on last Saturday. Had trouble getting in and out but It was just gorgeous. Must mention a handrail to the powers that be.
My big sister came to stay for a few days and it was so nice to have her near by instead of hundreds of kms away.
Bifold doors look like they are going in today. The renderer won't be here till next week but the builder has finished moving the steps out on the deck and building the new platform. The deck looks so big now without steps cutting into it and the doors open up that end of the house onto the deck and make everything look bigger and lighter. Bliss.

Now I need some serious fingercrossing please. The builders wife and children called in two days ago with coffee and cakes for morning tea for everyone. That night they found out that Catie has chicken pox and now if looks like her mother has them as well. Firstly, they also have a baby who hasn't been immunized yet so it might be good for him not to get the full blown chickenpox and also I would really appreciate not getting them at the moment too. Okay everyone on the count of three - fingers crossed and concentrate.

OK - I hope everyone had a wonderful new years eve and I am seriously going to try to not to over think 2011.
KISS (keep it simple stupid)

Update

Today I am going home from hospital. Early. Finally.

This has been so much harder than I thought it would be.

Just little things:
I was in ICU for 36 hours with very little sleep.
The worse moment was when the nurse had to take out the two drains before I had to come back to the ward.
The removal of the epidural was less traumatizing.
Lying on my back for 60 hours was difficult.
I felt that I had been forgotten when brought to my room but that turned out to be just the nurse that was on duty.
The food has been revolting. They don't really provide for people with dairy allergies.
I have survived on cold peanut butter toast, dubious sandwiches and jelly and herbal tea.
On the bright side I may have lost some weight even though I haven't had much exercise. Gareth brought me a ham, avocado and tomato sandwich yesterday.

The pain hasn't been too bad. Bearable.
My life started to return to semi normal when all the drips and catheters were removed.
Have started physio .

Have an appointment on Friday at local GP for the staples to be removed. Even have a special little tool to take with me. Am terrified.

And then, it is approximately 6 weeks until I can drive again.
Cannot carry anything over 1 kg. There goes my handbag - see previously post.
No bending and twisting.
Start walking 10 mins twice a day increasing 5 mins every week until I get up to 40 mins twice a day.
Physio exercising three times a day - including pool exercises when the staple holes heal up.

I now have some new hardware in my body. Two rods and four screws now holding part of my back together.

Update of the update - I'm home! I've had a cup of coffee and some real food. Oh happy days (cue the music)
More later

It's been a while

So much has happened since last time.

Twelfth Night at the Opera House was very good and Gareth really enjoyed it.

Jess passed her test with flying colours and is now awaiting her new posting. Again fingers crossed everyone (seems to work really well) that she gets the command she would like to be at.

Weight is going down slowly. I have lost 4.6kgs since I began this time. I might get back into my jeans yet.

I have had an endoscopy and found the cause of the pain. I have a healing medium size ulcer. Have to continue with medication and have another endoscopy next year to check how it goes.

My iPad has arrived and it is gorgeous. Just like a big iPhone but you cant make calls on it. I read the paper on it in the mornings. A few things I have to sort out but I will eventually.

Today is my last day at work until the end of January next year.

Tomorrow is Oprah day with Jess and on Wednesday I am off into hospital to have my lower back fused thanks to a very understandng neurosurgeon who wanted to operate on Tuesday and accomodated me on Wednesday instead. I will be in hospital for 10 days so will be out of contact for a while - at least until I can sit up and Mark brings me my iPad and iPhone. I wont be able to drive until early February and will have to wear a corset (hopefully looking really slim).

I will let you know about Oprah - I am looking forward to it but I hope it is not too hot.

Just in case I dont get back to you (hardly likely I know) have a wonderful Christmas and a hsppy new year.
xxx

Handbag stocktake

As I lugged my handbag into work today I thought, no wonder I have a sore back. This is the contents of my bag today

Red Leather Wallet which contains cards and notepad plus pencil and pen
Sunglasses (no case as I cant find it)
Coin Purse
Black wallet for extra cards and cash
Diary to use as a food tracker
iPac (work)
Digital camera
pain killers
2011 Diary
External HD
Hankie
Glasses (in case)
Another card holder for the excess cards I have (mainly store ones for rewards)
and this is before the iPad arrives.
Good grief!!!!
Now what is in yours?
Edit: Forgot the trusty iphone

On a sad note, the weight I was so excited to lose last week has returned. Not as much as I lost and I guess the difference was two restaurant meals. I really have to learn to do this better. Any hints greatly appreciated.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was very good. Maybe not for small children though. Definitely dark undertones and adult themes. Jess and I got to go with lots of young people. The girls in front of us, still in school uniform, were very funny and lovely. The younger boys from one of the North Shore's top private schools were hysterical to listen to. Anyway a good movie and a lovely dinner afterwards.

Saturday I went to the Sydney Opera House with Gareth. We had lunch first at Studio Cafe and then in to see Twelfth Night by the Bell Shakespeare company. I really enjoyed it and so did he. They are a wonderful company and the twists they put on Shakespeare are really great. Gareth really enjoyed it too and I think I may have found a person to go with finally. He actually said that it was awesome on facebook.

Have a good week and keep your fingers cross on Wednesday for Jess sitting her detective exam/interview.

the good the bad and hopefully no ugly

Starting with the good news - the scales told me I lost 1.2 kgs last week. After weeks of 100g and 200g losses (yes I know a loss is still a loss) you could have knocked me over with a feather at this weeks weigh in. I am back in the 60"s, just.

The bad is that everyone has tried to get me an emergency appointment with the neurosurgeon but they all hit the bane of so many peoples lives - the doctors receptionist. Firstly I found out that the rheumatologist's receptionist had not passed the MRI results on even though the email I received from her said she would. That had wasted nearly two weeks. Then the GP rang on Monday as I had spent three days in bed because the pain has escalated and she was told there are no emergency appointments and given the name of another doctor who is probably ok but this is my spine and I really want the best surgeon so I will wait until January for my appointment. GP has increased the slow release morphine dose and upped the painkiller and I've got my disability parking back again.

Yesterday I went back to work and found out that a friend who worked in the park and who I used to have coffee and gossip with had committed suicide on Saturday. Even now I am having trouble with this and tearing up. I should have been a better friend. I know loneliness and depression were part of the problem. Damn we get wrapped up in our own lives and don't reach out to others because we are too busy. I was alone at work yesterday and my beloved daughter who is on holidays and studying for her detective exams came down and spent the day with me so that I wasn't alone.

I have been a bit slack lately with reading you blogs. Not any more. I am going to get myself an iPad and I am going to carry it with me at all times so that I can find out what is going on in your lives at any moment.

Jess and I are going to see Harry Potter on Friday and then Gareth and I are going to see Twelfth Night by the Bell Shakespeare Company on Saturday. Very very different things but I love them both.

Finally, my thoughts are with the families and friends of the trapped miners. Have just heard the news of the second explosion and that there are no expected survivors. Gut wrenchingly crappy news. Namaste - May peace be with you all - eventually.

It's nearing Christmas time and

I am confined to bed again. Didnt't make it to work today. Cant walk. Rang the neurosurgeon yesterday about being put on the cancellation list and asked had they received the MRI report. The answer was no. So rang the rheumotologist and asked had they sent it and the receptionist said she had not send it because she didnt know that she had too. Unfortunately I had an email from them saying that was what they were going to do. I know mistakes happen but I thought I have been waiting to hear from someone about the results and nothing had been done.

I have been trying to keep mobile but I think last Wednesday's yoga was the last time for this year which makes me sad. I enjoy it so much but the pain is now too great. Have also put my gym membership on hold until next year.

I have spent today in bed and probably will spend the weekend in bed too. I can't not walk. I have to go and see Oprah with Jess! LOL. Glad I have my priorities right. Only another four weeks of work - four fairly important weeks of work. Please, I need a break.

On top of all this I have to have an endoscopy in two weeks time. Keeps getting better doesnt it.

The back pain is being caused by degeneration to the spine probably by the arthritis and also this time I now have a cyst on my spine which is pressing on the nerve. I think it is nerve pain that I am feeling and painkillers don't seem to work with nerve pain.

Oh well, a quiet weekend ahead. Poor Mark - thank goodness he has retired from work. He has to take over everything now, as well as helping the builder, etc etc.

Enjoy yourselves.

Pandora charm award (finally)

I have lost another 200g this week. Painfully slow but still....
A pandora charm, an owl for wisdom, has joined the buddha (for calmness) on my necklace. A new charm for every kilo.

Exciting news, Jess has been allocated tickets in the ballot to go and see Oprah on the 14th December and is taking me. Woohoo! I didnt know anything about this so was very excited to get the news. Have already put in my request for long service leave for that day.

Back or whatever it is, is still painful. Had an MRI on Friday. Just part of my contributing to keeping the health system afloat in NSW. Hopefully will get some feedback today.

Still having a problem with possum in the cavity. I think we have upset him by removing part of the eaves and the outside brick wall. Mark was out there last night building a possum highway because he was afraid that he couldnt get down. So cute (Mark that is not the possum - no the possum is cute but vicious and smelly and I dont want him to live in the roof.)

Out to dinner twice on the weekend and had Italian both times and am paying for eating cheese. The rash is back. But I dont care - I love Italian and I knew when I was enjoying it that this would probably be the outcome but it will be gone in a couple of days and it was worth it.

Going to see Leonard Cohen tomorrow night at the Acer Arena at Homebush with a girlfriend. I heard that his concert last time he was here was brilliant and I am hoping for a repeat performance.

Have a great week everyone. Under 7 weeks to Christmas - dont panic!

What's buzzing this week?

Sorry sorry sorry - have been very very busy and sick and all the normal stuff.

After losing 1.2 kgs in one go I have lost 300 g over the past 2 weeks. Very very demoralising as I have been sick and not wanting to eat a lot like I normally do and I have been keeping a food diary via the internet and have kept well below points and not even added in bonus exercise points.

Have been going to gym twice a week, walking Lucy four days a week and yoga once a week and it doesnt seem to make any difference.

All this exercise has been happening through pain (doctor has increased dosage of painkillers) but it doesnt seem to make any difference. So while this week I am still tracking the food, I am doing very little exercise.

Scans and xrays showed all sorts of nasty things have happened to my back. Dr A (Rheumotologist) has asked me to get an MRI done and then he will ring the neurosurgeon and try and get me moved up the list a bit.

Mark (god bless his little cotton socks) is worried that I will once again stuff up Christmas by being sick. As if I do this on purpose.

Anyway, catchups:
If you get a chance go and see Jersey Boys. Incredible show. Great singing, sets etc etc. Of course it helps if you like the music.

I have bought a lovely long dress for Christmas. All reds and oranges. Please please let it be a lovely hot Christmas this year and not back into winter woolies.

Renovations have started again. Do have a picture of the starting work.
The outer brick wall has been removed and work has started on the inner brick wall. Dust like you wouldnt imagine but the idea of having a long table/s the length of the deck and the family room for Christmas day is keeping me happy. It was amazing to see what the inside of the cavity looks like - no wonder we have had trouble putting in electricals - trying to get them past all those concrete "dags" but apparently the roughness of the bricking has something to do with the rendering of the inside walls - better perhaps.

Anyway, new bifold doors will go across this space - goodbye backdoor and window. The stairs for the deck have to be resituated or else that first step will be a doozy and I can fall quite easily down the back steps without any help thank you very much.

Mind you I dont think it has stopped raining since these renos started so blame me - it always happens. Garden looks wonderful though.

Last trivia of the year this Friday night. We have won the last two out of three so keep your fingers crossed that we will continue to mow down all the opposition before us. Me competitive - never!

Hopefully my weight will dip a bit more next week. Isnt it funny - this weight has snuck on insidiously over the past 18 months using stealth and camouflage and now I want it gone - NOW! So unrealistic but normal I thinks.

Hope all you lovelies in Aussieland have a great day today and back a winner in the Melbourne Cup. Sometimes it is hard to work by yourself in an isolated location. Oh well have one for me.

Have a great rest of week and weekend.

Things I have managed

In the last week I have managed to finally lose 1.2kgs mainly through not stuffing myself with food or overdoing the wine. Not rocket science but nonetheless hard for someone who has quite enjoyed stuffing herself and overdoing the wine.

Even went out to dinner two nights and still managed to keep my appetite under control.

Been to see "Eat Pray and Love". Enjoyable light chick flick. They probably could have made three movies concentrating on each country Liz Gilbert visited in that year but nonetheless got the main points across I think.

Have put my back out yet again. I am so over my health. Cant get into see the neurosurgeon until January so GP has put me on a low dose morphine patch to cope with the pain. Doesnt seem to working all that well but then again I have not stopped living my normal life even if walking Lucy does take a lot longer than it did. Off to get CT scan and xrays on Wednesday.

Went back to yoga last Wednesday. Slightly painful because of abovementioned back, but I managed and glad to be back there again. Teacher still wonderful.

Bestfriend and her husband arriving on Thursday and then two hectic days of dinners out and off to see Jersey Boys on Friday night. They leave on Saturday to continue their trip further south and I have plans to watch the first movie "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" if I can find it at the video store on Saturday night while I recover.

Sunday is beloved middle sister's birthday so off to visit her.

It is so busy at this time of year - no wonder everybody gets frazzled.

Mum's estate is finally being wound up this week which is good. The amount of work that Mark has done to sort it all out has been mammoth and I know he will be glad that it is finally finished.

Builder hasnt been sighted re doors. Hopefully soon.

That's all. Hope you had a great week and are having a great week.
xxx

Thank you

Thank you for all your birthday wishes. I had a lovely day. My family told me that for my birthday I was going skydiving, night skydiving while holding sparklers. I didnt really believe them because heights and I dont seem to get on too well. My friend told me that at least it was at night and I wouldnt see the ground. So reassuring. Anyway it turned out to be a lovely dinner at "AdLib" in Pymble. Nice food and good service. Also another pandora charm from eldest sister, flowers, a new crossword dictionary and a electronic crossword solver. A subscription to a puzzle magazine is apparently on the way. (You can tell I do like crosswords).


Also this beautiful azalea came into flower on my birthday as it does every year. My late much loved mother-in-law gave it to me on my 25th birthday which you probably have guessed is eons ago. Appropriately it is called "silver anniversary". It has survived many moves and survived. It used to cascade over the stone edging on the garden but apparently it was killing The Grass so I have had to cut i back but it is regrowing again within its boundaries. Also this year there is a genetic mutation that seems to have occurred. One branch of flowers is different to the rest of the bush. Very strange.

The other milestone is that I have finally finished reading the Stieg Larsson trilogy. I have had these books for literally years but while I absolutely love his women characters I have trouble reading about the bad men characters. I cant really explain it but yesterday since I was sick yet again I knuckled down and picked up The Girl who Kicked the Hornets Nest and finished it. I loved it as I have loved the others. I reread the last chapters twice - I guess I didnt want it to end but end it has as he has passed away and there will be no more books about Lisbeth Salander.

It is a long weekend here today in New South Wales and it is raining as it rained yesterday. I will eventually get back out in my garden but I dont know when. Another weeks schools holidays and then back to work for the final rush towards the end of the year.

Tourists in our home city

Today I dragged my darling husband into the city to do a bit of sight seeing. He didnt want to go but came with me under sufferance (I can be very persuasive sometimes).

We caught the train to St James station and then had a look through St James church. I think, the oldest church in Sydney. Absolutely beautiful. Had a look through the crypt too where there is a childrens chapel.

Then off to David Jones for lunch in the food hall. An antipasto platter and a glass of sauvignon blanc. Just right. Mark had the plowmen's lunch.

The we walked through Hyde Park and had a look at the photographic exhibition that is on there. Giant photos on canvas. Interesting and of course such a beautiful day.

Decided to walk down Macquarie Street to Circular Quay admiring the gorgeous old churches and sandstone buildings on the way. Through the Sydney Hospital to the domain and then down past the State Library, the Conservatorium and the Botanical Gardens. All the statues were dressed up for the festival that is happening at the moment.

This was Shakespeare and Co
near the library.














Then down the Circular Quay and onto a ferry to Milsons Point. Actually got off a Kirribilli wharf and walked up under the harbour bridge (a bit windy) up to Milsons Point station and then onto a train home.

A lovely day doing something that we dont usually do and a little bit of training in walking for me. Painkillers along the way helped.







PS Builder came over last night and there is talk of the family room renovations being started soon. We went and talked to the bifold door company this afternoon. Keep your fingers crossed that this is finished by Christmas.

A new tack

Awoke this morning to a beautiful sunny day. I love the early morning at the moment but I guess it will regress when daylight saving comes in soon.

Arrived at work and it was misty and mysterious looking. Couldn't see the boats anchored across the bridge. Wanted to take a picture but the sun that was trying to break through the mist was too bright and I kept getting what looked like a pole in the middle of the picture.

Looked out my office window a little bit later and saw the most amazing sight. There must have been 50 cormorants sitting on the seawall drying their wings and just generally catching up. Rang Mark to tell him as I thought the fish might be running but he thought it must be because of the rough seas at the moment. He was out pulling out the frangipani (frost finally got it this year) and planting out my olive tree. Would love to turn that part of the garden into a garden or a chook run but that would take more of his valuable grass and the moaning would be unliveable with.





(Pictures by my boss)

Such a beautiful day and I went for a stroll at lunch time. No fish swimming around but that might be due to the cormorants who have since moved on but probably scared the fish witless. The little swallows that nest under the bridge were out and about picking up mud at low tide for their nests.

Hundreds of little crabs scurrying around in the mud and hiding when I come near. So cute. How do they know I am here?

Something flowering and I dont know what it is but it smelt wonderful. Will find out when the guys return and try to remember for next time. Might have been a pittosperum - yes just looked it up on wikepedia and that is what it is. Smells heavenly.

Baby ducklings out and about with Mum and Dad Duck. Five little ones this time. I hope they survive.

A few more hours of work and then off to the hairdressers and some shopping and then home to walk Lucy. Hope the weather holds for me.

Spring makes me feel so contented.

A Week Like No other

Friday 17 September 2010
Firstly, my deepest sympathies to Anne. You have been in my thoughts constantly for the last couple of days. Hope you are coping. I cant imagine what you are going through but know that your family and friends as well as your blends will be there for you.

Secondly I am back on the methotrexate and am really foggy. This is my third attempt at this medication and hopefully my last. The only reaction so far has been this fogginess and of course extreme tiredness. Plus a sudden loss of memory.
Back to fortnightly blood tests.

Have not been able to get back to pilates in ages as my stomach pains make it impossible.

Monday 20th September 2010
If anyone has a pilates dvd with sessions that last about 20 mins let me know. I need to do something soon.

I know that I am not supposed to weigh myself everyday but I do. I understand why it is a bad thing because between Saturday morning and this morning I have put on 1.3 kilos and I dont think I have done anything terribly wrong. Bugger Bugger damn damn.

Okay got that out of my system. Am moving on.

A question of balance

Whew - we have finally nearly finished Mark's birthmonth. It has been hectic and a lot of fun.

The warbird flight was brought forward from 11 am last Saturday week to 8 am and I was wondering how I was going to get 8 people down to the local airport to watch but it all turned out well. The pilot actually did the aerobatics over the house we were staying at so we just sat out on the terrace and watched Mark have the ride of his life. I swear, he didnt stop smiling all day.

The rest of the weekend was lovely too and finally last weekend he had his party at the golf club and once again had a ball. Mind you he is the original little party animal and age certainly hasnt slowed him down too much. My bestie and her husband flew down from Queensland and stayed for the weekend too so it was full on.
Party on Friday night and not in bed until 2.
Mark up again at 6 to play golf.
The rest of us had a leisurely start to the day and then caught the train into the city and went to the David Jones foodhall and had lunch at the antipasto bar and taste tested our way around, had coffee, went shopping and then caught the train home to a beautiful chicken curry prepared by the birthday boy when he got home from golf. Nobody needed any rocking that night and we were in bed by midnight.

Up again the next day and off to lunch at Buddha Belly at Terrey Hills to meet up with friends and then out to airport to drop our visitors off and then off to a sausage sizzle with the neighbours and then home and bed.

Didnt want to get out of bed this morning but there was the promise of another lovely Sydney winter day, not a doona day, so I eventually got out of bed and was only minutely late for work.

Planning for the Tasmanian trip is starting to come together. Got lots of recommendations about what we should see and do and where to stay.

Now the title of this post - Balance.
I have noticed that more and more people are talking about balance in their life. People perceive balance in lots of different ways but it is amazing that in the end balance is still balance. (Of goodness I am getting all mystic.)

Anyway while we were away in the Hunter with my wonderful children, my son and I had a long talk about eating habits and weight. He has lost some weight by just following simple "rules:
No fried food
No sugar
Eat dinner early
Eat more fruit

Now he never could be accused of being fat or even overweight, but has trimmed down so that he can fit back into a favourite pair of jeans and stopped the weight training because it was thickening up his neck muscles and he couldnt do up his dress shirts anymore. LOL.

No counting points, showing some restraint and I guess taking responsibility. Taking this slowly, and being superstitious I am not going to talk about this anymore. Just to say I am attempting to slowly change my habits but I am not going to beat myself up anymore about it.

I want to fit back into my clothes
I want to give myself a fighting chance against the disease that is trying to cripple me
basically I just want something better with more balance.

Not a big ask.

Completely on a different track
Anyway I have also taken up crocheting again. I had all this wool that I was going to knit into squares but my hands wont let me but I have discovered that I can still crochet so I am happily making squares for the new blanket for Lucy the wonderdog and next year I will see if I can donate crochet rugs to the "Wrapped with Love" project. It is awesome - I have something to do with my hands of an evening that I quite enjoy doing.

So, if anyone out there needs some knitting needles let me know because I dont think I will be using them anymore and I have got stacks.

Whew! What a busy weekend.

Not feeling well lately and it seems to hit me on Friday night and makes Saturday mornings painful and therefore no pilates which is killing me.

The no dairy diet is difficult (being a big cheese lover) but has helped immensely. The few times I have chanced it or inadvertently had dairy I have paid for it very soon after with an immediate flare-up of the eczema but on a whole am managing to keep it under control. I just want to heal now but that will take months.

We went to see Let It Be at the opera house on Saturday. We went into the city early and had a few drinks in the Rocks, caught up with some friends and then went to the show. It had Doug Parkinson, Jon Stevens, Jack Jones and John Waters in it and was excellent. Didnt get home until midnight and I think I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

Dragged myself out of bed and got ready to go out to lunch and we were just lucky to miss the most incredible storm that raged through Sydney yesterday. Pouring rain, hail and thunder all within about 10 minutes. The restaurant actually turned the heaters on because the temperature dropped quickly but everything was back to normal within 15 minutes and more importantly the washing got dry by the time we got back home. Lovely lunch with lovely people.

So today, have walked around a small area of the national park I work in. Breezy down the southern end and the smell of the salt water was invigorating. Sunny cloudless blue skies, magpies, cockatoos, a swamp heron and plovers but did not sight any schools of small fish. Watched women getting ready to go kayaking and felt a bit envious but my time will come for lovely indulgences. It wasnt a brisk walk just a stroll because my ankle is sore from Saturday's trip to the city and I want to give it time to recover. So no gym today either just a bit of shopping and I have to buy a new black pashmini type thing because of course I lost my beloved one on Saturday. Probably take Lucy for a walk towards sunset. It is such a nice relaxing time of the day to be out walking. Something about the sun setting seems to soothe me - dont know why.

The nights this week will be taken up with cooking food for the weekend. We are off to the Hunter again on Friday to celebrate Mark's 60th birthday with family. I can't remember whether I mentioned it but I have booked a flight for him in an old fighter plane. Hopefully the weather holds for him as it is the pivotal part of the weekend, keep your fingers crossed.

Enjoy your week - stop, turn your faces to the sun and breathe deeply. Spring is stirring although I dont think winter has quite finished with us yet.

PS: didnt get a chance to post this on Monday and would you believe when I went for my walk at lunchtime on Tuesday the creek was literally alive with fish. It was incredible to watch them darting around and not just little ones either, some really big ones. I tried to describe the big ones to a workfriend and his response was that I had just described a fish. Also managed to buy another black scarf/shawl pretty much identical to the one I lost but it was expensive. Cooking for weekend is progressing well - lasagne and soup made, meat ordered and casserole to be made tonight in slow cooker. Other than that I have managed to lose my credit card but luckily the butcher has it and has promised me that I can have it back as soon as they have filled up their cars - clowns.
Really going this time and pushing publish post button otherwise this could turn into a novella.

From my sister

Part of an email my sister sent me -

With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much
information and wisdom in our heads that when
there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will
think, ¨Good grief, look how smart I am!¨

A great way to look at yourself (or myself) I think.
:)

Mindsets

Funny how if you think something for long enough it becomes fact.

My particular mindset at the moment is - gee I am hungry. Yes I am hungry but I am not starving. Hungry is not a bad thing it might mean that my body might decide to eat some of the stored food (this little squirrel must have thought it was going to be a tough winter because she has put away rather a lot of food stores). I dont need to eat something immediately. All that it does is makes me bigger. A few gentle comments from my beloved has got me back on track. He is worried about the damage that I am doing to myself when my body is quite capable of damaging itself without my help.

Anyway saw the surgeon today and he is happy with the new ankle (not so new now - nearly 16 mths old). Have to get an MRI on the other ankle because something is going on there but nothing as bad as what has happened.

Bought a cute little pad from KikkiK about 21 days to make something a habit. Things like staying within daily point allowance, walking 10,000 steps, drinking my bottle of water, having alcohol-free days etc. I keep it on my bedside table and the last thing I do before I go to bed is tick off what I have accomplished that day. It makes me try harder. I always was the child that wanted the gold star.

Well done to the All Blacks. It was like watching a trainwreck and I think that I will join Peter Fitzsimmons and start calling them the Australiasian Allblacks. A word of warning (from past history guys) dont peak too early. Save something for next year.

After a couple of days of wild and woolly weather, today is a glorious winter day with blue skies and sunshine.

I can feel a hint of spring. The jonquils are out in my garden, the azaleas are beginning their annual flower show and I've noticed the beautiful big dusky pink magnolia buds are starting to open. I wish I could have a magnolia but, sigh, I have been banned from buying one. I do have a port wine magnolia from which I have struck numerous cuttings and planted surreptitiously in various parts of the gardens. Am I in for a lecture when he discovers this.

Anyway I am off to do some more work. Have a great day/week.

MIA yet again

Sorry I have been MIA yet again.

Been having to work some stuff out. AND it has become more difficult in a way.

For over 7 months I have been suffering with eczema and nobody was interested. Not the GP not the dermatologist. The last dermatologist I saw in early July wanted to do yet another biopsy. That was never going to happen. Due to the meds I have to take my healing process is so slow. The GP suggested cortisone cream and putting tegaderm over it (which is kind of like sticky gladwrap). But if you saw the surface area I had to cover you would be going out and buying shares in Nexcare.

Anyhoos have been surfing the internet and researching eczema and something caught my eye and memory. Two years ago when I had a procedure which I cant remember the name of but was both ends and no big deal the doctor mentioned lactose intolerence might be the reason for the stomach pains. Of course I didnt take any notice - hey why am I paying these guys all this money so that I can ignore them.

Anyway the long and the short of it is since last Friday afternoon (a week) I have virtually cut out lactose from my diet as best I can. I am really afraid to say this and am frantically touching wood but I have not itched once since and slowly, so very slowly the itchy red spots are healing.

I need to tell you that I was at the p*ssed off stage before the revelation. No one was offering me any viable and longterm answers. Maybe this wont be a longterm answer but let me tell you - sleeping through the night without scratching myself to pieces is marvellous.

I am back to building up my exercise at the gym (not too strenuous), doing pilates once a week and walking Lucy twice a week. I see the ankle surgeon next week and I think there may be problems but I dont care.

My weight is still horrendous but one thing at a time.

It is Mark's 60th birthday next month and I think he is nearly retired. He has bought a new laptop and downloaded all his personal stuff off the work computer in readiness for its return.

We are spending the weekend of his birthday up at the Hunter with the children and his brother and sister and his brother's wife. We have rented a house for the weekend and I am sending him up in an old fighter plane for the ride of his life. The bonus is that the people who own the house have said that Lucy can come too. A visit to the dog beauty parlour is in order.

Jess and I went to Rozelle Markets last Sunday and I found a pottery beer stein for Mark which he proudly took to drinks on Sunday night. Then we drove to Haberfield for coffee and arancini but they dont make arancini on Sundays but the soy flat white was nice. Jess will go back when she is posted back to Gladesville and get some arancini for me during the week. After that we went to IKEA to return some cushions and then home for afternoon tea with friends. Nothing got done at home but it was a lovely day.

What else - the Tour de France is finished for another year. I am suffering MasterChef withdrawal but I have the new magazine and am planning to make Alvin's drunken chicken. I love Lie to Me and Undercover Boss is becoming a favourite along with Doc Martin.

Rugby tomorrow night. Go the Wallabies! (Anne and Sue dont hate me)

Friday night, can hear the rain again on the roof outside my study and I am so happy to be able to sleep in a little bit tomorrow morning and a lot on Sunday. Have a good one.

PS - Oh by the way I have indulged myself with another Spencer and Rutherford bag. On special of course and it hasnt arrived yet but I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it. I think I need to join handbags anonymous.

Winter Solstice

Hooray, we are halfway through. In theory the days will start getting longer but Mark reckons that the next three months will be the coldest. Let's hope he is wrong.

Been off colour again. Could be the medication I think. We went to a wedding on Saturday and I took my tablets with what I thought was water but actually was lemonade. Not too sure that they went together and the lemonade may have removed the protective coating on the tablets too quickly.

Lost 100g this week. Not great but a loss is a loss but 100g could be the difference between going to the toilet or not before weigh-in.

My sitting in the sun has not been too successful. Managed two days last week. I think this is one of the wettest winters we have had but I wont complain as it is nice to be out of drought at least in Sydney.

Was playing with the idea in my mind this morning that maybe the next time I have to have a major operation I may retire so that I can concentrate on regaining my health as my number one job. We will see. I do love my job and the people I work with. Maybe it was just because it was raining this morning and Mark and Lucy were having a "doona day".

I hope you all have a wonderful week ahead of you.

Something's not right

God I feel strange. Slightly empty, a bit disorientated, sad, lethagic, uninterested, generally blaaah. I just want to curl up and hibernate. Maybe I am a bear.

It could be SAD I guess. I really dont get out in the sun much nowadays. Lunches are usually spent either at my desk or in the lunch area. Not good. Sun is still coming up when I go to work and getting dark when I get home. Need to get out in the park at lunch time for 10 minutes to rejuvenate my battery. This will be my aim this weekend and next week.

Roll on winter solstice. The day light hours will start lengthening again soon. This morning was freezing and frosty. Jess's windscreen was iced up. It was 3 degrees in the car park at work this morning and I have had a variety of heating implements powering away to keep me warm. Have finally taken my coat off - now just three layers of clothes.

Am supposed to be going to gym this afternoon but thinking of giving it a miss. I know this is not the right way to think but that is where I am at the moment.

Sorry to unload but needed to tell someone.